Top ten chuck norris facts

01 Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
02 Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
03 Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes k!lling.
04 If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from [rip].
05 Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
06 When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
07 Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK[..]assination. As Oswald shot, Chuck Norris met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
08 Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
09 They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take !! from anybody.
10 A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.

I don't care bring on the hate, but this !! made me laugh..

i chuckled its funny.

!! was funny to me[pic]

Chuck Norris once took an entire bottle of sleeping pills....... He blinked.

its like im really back in year 2000

Jesus can walk on water. Chuck norris can swim through land.

Kids wear superman pajamas to bed. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas to bed.

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Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number, you answered the wrong phone.

Chuck Norris's email address is

Chuck Norris invented the original periodic table...there's was only one element - the element of surprise

Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin

Chuck Norris found the Hidden Valley Ranch

The Total Gym uses Chuck Norris to stay in shape

Some guy stole Chuck Norris's Daughter virginity, he got it back[pic]

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Chuck Norris doesnt get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.