Flat Broke Nigga Blues

[aplus]

http://slumz.boxden.com/showthread.php?t=621840

From my rhyming battle with TonyGee...crit or compliment, please...A+


Flat Broke Nigga Blues

It feels like this month, every nickel costs a dime
And the things that I need most are money and time
Situation is so bad, I need to write it down in rhyme
Got a square brother like me contemplating doing crime

You see, the hunger in my belly is too persistent to ignore
But I’ve got no credit line, unless I shoplift from the store
I pay these bills when I can, but the bastards still want more
Late with my rent again, so I duck the landlord at the door

Monetary pressure grips tightly like a noose around my neck
Been out of work for three weeks, there’s no sign of a paycheck
Want to look for another job, but my Cutlass sedan is a wreck
It’s a perpetual game of chess where I’m constantly in check

Looked under couch cushions for change, found nothing except lint
I prayed to God last night for cash, hoping that blessings will be sent
My girlfriend showed me a jewelry ad, that’s her not-so-subtle hint
She wants more bling for Valentine’s, but my money’s already spent

I don’t want to be the next brother handcuffed on the 10 o’clock news
Singing those sad, society-screwed-me-now-I’m-flat-broke nigga blues
Hustling’s no longer an option, or at least it’s one I don’t want to choose
So how am I supposed to win when the deck’s stacked for me to lose?

[Shorty11aka O]

u hit the nail on the head wit this one, i love the connection .... madd props !!!

[foxylady06]

man i'm feel'n u aplus, u pretty much put the blues i'm feeling into words. keep ur head up:) and i loved the way this flowed!

[Gadgetgirl]

You see, the hunger in my belly is too persistent to ignore
But I’ve got no credit line, unless I shoplift from the store

Man, A+ you never fail your readers. That drop was smooth like honey infused peanut butter, yet hard like a wake up call brick to the face. :applause:

[tonygee]

u kno i liked sh*t i got to i lost to it propz

[WhiteBoy773]

aNOTHER GOOD DROP a+

[fairelyse]

A+ by all my standards... I know a whole lot of folks including myself who feel your pain

[trueblackman420]

i'm feelin this
because i'm in the same situation
major props

[YoungHope]

As a college student, i'm feelin that sh*t

[adams470]

^^^yeah I know how you feel..props aplus good post, painted a good picture.

[lilcam]

that poem was tight

[lilcam]

prop me please

[aplus]

thanks for all the positive feedback all

[educ8dfemale]

I truley enjoy reading your works...:applause:

"Must spread rep before I can Prop A+ again"

[bigmike123456]

good job you did your thing

[mygangstalean]

that was a pretty good poem man, one of the better ones ive read on this site

[aplus]

thanks for the +tive feedback

[DERRTY CHYBO]

That was tight man

[biggajw04]

Damn...that's deep...a tear fell domn my eye after i read that.......I feel your pain...prop me back

[MyzLuda86]

I really enjoyed reading this I know how your feeling all the time everyday.

[Aquarius45]

That is whats up. I like that poem so much, and whats crazy is that it is true. Mad love on that.

[aplus]

Thanks ya'll - it is cool to write something that feels real to people thanks for the feedback

[peoples4you]

great stuff

propz 4 this

[Lasher]

Ill sh*t.
EDIT: Had to come back and edit I was speechless after I first read this, this is extremely good sh*t u stopped me in my tracks with this one; propz and keep it up u just gave me a reason to keep visiting this section.

[aplus]

thanks for peepin this and 4 the feedback

[Staggolee420]

man that was a great drop for sure. Liked everythin you had to say, and I been there too. Know that if you're commited to making things work, they always will.