SuNsHiNe_BLuE
04-30-2005, 09:24 PM
This is some hella different sh*t for me so I'm not sure how it will be received....so hate it or love it but let me know what you think...
...and as i walked in the door
of the house i've lived in
for as long as i can remember,
everything seemed different...
the carpet was softer and
the rainbow reflection from the
livingroom window where the
blinds were bent from last year
was especially beautiful today...
the sounds from the
neighbors upstairs suddenly
didn't bother me so much...
and the stain on the kitchen wall
that used to annoy me because
it wouldn't go away
all of a sudden reminded me of
a heart drawn by my daughter
and it meant the world to me...
...because they said it might be
because they said it could be
my heart thought it definitely was
and the neverending prospect of
unanswered questions and
hesitant "what ifs"
overwhelmed me in a way
i had never experienced before
silent, violent, rage and
quiet, solitary confusion...
...and out of the corner of
my eye i saw it there
sitting on my emotional shelf
in a container marked 'HOPE'
and i dared not open it
because i was terrified of
what it couldn't give me...time
it couldn't give me time to reflect
or time to prepare
or time to complete the
yet unwritten list of
'things to do before i die'
and i was frozen solid
stiff in a state of waiting
watching
hoping
praying
and holding tight to
the still unopened container of hope
wondering if i could hold on
for just long enough
to get to open it...
...and as i walked in the door
of the house i've lived in
for as long as i can remember,
everything seemed different...
the carpet was softer and
the rainbow reflection from the
livingroom window where the
blinds were bent from last year
was especially beautiful today...
the sounds from the
neighbors upstairs suddenly
didn't bother me so much...
and the stain on the kitchen wall
that used to annoy me because
it wouldn't go away
all of a sudden reminded me of
a heart drawn by my daughter
and it meant the world to me...
...because they said it might be
because they said it could be
my heart thought it definitely was
and the neverending prospect of
unanswered questions and
hesitant "what ifs"
overwhelmed me in a way
i had never experienced before
silent, violent, rage and
quiet, solitary confusion...
...and out of the corner of
my eye i saw it there
sitting on my emotional shelf
in a container marked 'HOPE'
and i dared not open it
because i was terrified of
what it couldn't give me...time
it couldn't give me time to reflect
or time to prepare
or time to complete the
yet unwritten list of
'things to do before i die'
and i was frozen solid
stiff in a state of waiting
watching
hoping
praying
and holding tight to
the still unopened container of hope
wondering if i could hold on
for just long enough
to get to open it...